How and Why to Give Kids an Allowance

coins-in-handThe days of paper routes are over, yet the market is flooded with gadgets and games kids insist they must have in order to simply exist. It’s a tough parenting world today. We want to teach our kids responsibility, work ethic and long term gratification. These values can be modeled, and they can also be instilled in the younger child. Once your child is eight or nine years old, it’s time to start.

Ground Rules

One of the ways to instill these values is through having your child earn an allowance. It’s a wide range here, given the huge maturity differences between eight year olds and fifteen year olds. Some basic pointers on establishing the ground rules and expectations for an allowance follow.

  • Select what works for your family and good luck!
  • Work together with your child to establish the the rules and expectations.
  • Decide on what chores will need to be completed and what the payment will be.
  • Will this happen on a monthly basis or weekly?
  • Can the child accomplish part of the list and receive partial payment?

The more you engage your child in this process, the greater sense of ownership they’ll have. If they suggest they don’t want to work for an allowance, that’s fine too. Just let them know they won’t be receiving any discretionary spending money each week. That may eventually begin to burn!

Quality control

Will you ensure that the chores are completed to the best of our child’s ability in a timely manner or will you ask your child to check behind himself? Remember, this is a learning process and won’t necessarily go smoothly out of the gate. Work together to look at the final product. This will reinforce the value of responsibility and pride in one’s work. It’s a slow lesson to learn and trait to develop, but you will be giving them a gift that will last longer than any of the latest must have gadgets on the market.

Encourage your child to set short and long term goals with the allowance he receives. Setting aside a portion of the allowance each week might result in a trip to the Disney Store for a favorite toy or figurine. A short term reward might be a trip to the ice cream shop. Encourage, empower and reward your child throughout the process. Establishing the foundations for an allowance will help develop the values of responsibility, work ethic and long term gratification that are so critical in all aspects of life. Good luck!

Building Your Kid’s Confidence

SONY DSCRaising children is not easy, especially in today’s challenging environment. So many things can affect your kid’s self-image that regular trips to hair salons just aren’t going to cut it. You need to boost your kid’s sense of self now to help them become socially adjusted and successful adults in the future. Here are some ways for building your kid’s confidence.


Make them feel loved

Kids always need to feel loved at home. It is how they develop a sense of worth. As parents, we often forget to show them how much we love them because we are working so hard to give them everything they need. The things we give or the fantastic yearly vacations we bring them on are not important. It is the five minutes at breakfast we spend asking them about their plans for the day, and the minute we take to tuck them in and kiss them goodnight. What matters is an encouraging nod when they are not doing well, sympathy when they fail, and acknowledgement when they succeed.

Give them structure

Rules give your kid a sense of security. It may seem the height of cool to be a friend to your kid, but young children need you to be a parent more than they need a friend. Give them rules to live by, and this will give them the structure they need to build upon. Explain to them the consequences of their actions when they break the rules, and follow through no matter what. Giving in to what your kid wants will backfire on them and you in the end.

Encourage them in their inclinations

Don’t impose your own ambitions and expectations on your kids. Give them the freedom to develop their own interests and support them in whatever they choose to do as much as you can.

Kids are resilient, and they are full of possibilities. If you do your job as a parent in developing a confident kid, then you should have nothing to worry about for their future.


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